Much needed update

It's been way too long since I've written in. I figure it's time to remedy that. I don't know where to start, so I'll start with a quick recap and then get to the present. I was able to go home for Christmas. It was really nice to be home. Geoff brought his fiancé, Emily, and it was nice meeting her. She's a cute girl. I like her. When I got back, work was insanely busy and stressful because we had so many issues with the Financial Aid system. All the stress caught me off guard and I have had a lot of anxiety the past month, not able to handle with the normal stresses of life. I went to the doctor about it and she put me on Zoloft, which is an anti-depressant, ironically. We'll see how it goes. It's supposed to take 2 weeks to get into my system. So far the side effects include 1) loss of appetite (yeah! Help in my quest to lose weight--which btw, I have lost 20 pounds since last May when I started the journey! YEAH!); 2) dry mouth, which makes me drink more water, which makes me go to the bathroom more, resulting in more breaks at work, helping me to focus better! 3) sleepiness (at least I think it is a symptom, if not, I am tired anyway)--I have been going to bed at 9 and 10 every night this week. I must say, it's not entirely that bad. It's getting me on a better sleeping schedule then I've ever been on. All in all, I've felt less stressed. It could be a combination of a lot of things: exercising, eating right, sleeping better, I started listening to relaxation CD's before bed, etc.

Yesterday was an awesome day at church. I was fasting about what I need to do to get married as it has been a hard lately. Well, Relief Society was absolutely amazing! Amber (the RS Pres.) talked about the very topic of being single and having trials. She talked about the Brother of Jared and how he was commanded to build barges. She posed the question, why did the Lord have them build barges with no openings that get tossed around the ocean and not a ship like Nephi? Her point was that the Lord took away their control so they could rely fully on the Lord to take them where He is leading them. It was really powerful for me. I don't know where the Lord is leading me or when I'm going to marry or to who, but I know He is aware of me. Amber's parents spoke to us as well. Her mom said something to help me see a positive aspect of being single. She mentioned that since Amber is single, it gives her mom more time to be with Amber. I realized that I go to my parents a lot when I am having issues. Who knows how often that will happen when I get married and actually DO have someone else to turn to. I'm glad I can be so close to them. Amber's dad also spoke to us. He is a patriarch. He talked about how we are all choice daughters of Zion, which is something my patriarchal blessing said. It was a nice tender mercy to realize the Lord's love for me and awareness of my situation. Everyone in the room needed to hear it. Everyone was sniffling because of tears. It was kind of funny, but really amazing that we all needed it so much.

It's my birthday today, and I've been celebrating all weekend. Friday night I went to Turcanos with Josh . His birthday is on Feb 10th, so we celebrated together. On Saturday I went to lunch with Erin, Jenny, and Ved. Yesterday I had a party with cake and ice cream for my friends and ward members. A lot of people came. It was nice. Dave was a friend from Alta who I haven't really talked to much before. He's friends with Erin, Jenny, Sarah, etc. but I haven't had many conversations with him. He came last night to my party and it was fun getting to know him a little. Turns out we have a lot in common. I wanted to see a movie today for my birthday (Aunt Teresa gave me a gift certificate for Christmas a year ago and I wanted to use it), so I asked if Sarah and Dave wanted to go. Sarah didn't, but Dave wanted to. So, we went to see "The Blind Side" today. It is a REALLY good movie! I totally cried. Dave was cute about it. He kept asking if I was okay. He doesn't have much of a bubble either, I have noticed. When he would talk to me, he would speak pretty closely. It was kind of cute. I don't know if he's nice or if he has interest, but I hope he has interest. I sure do. When we were leaving the theater, he followed me to my side (I was driving) and after I unlocked the door, he opened it for me! Huge points! We'll see if he calls me to do something, but I've learned to not hold my breath, only hope. Tonight we’re going ice skating for FHE. I’m looking forward to that. It will be fun. :)